5 Ways To Keep The Spark Alive In Your Relationship

Hey, I'm Karyn, your Relationship Coach with A Better Relationship Coaching.  And this is my podcast A Better Relationship In Five Minutes. And today I wanted to talk to you guys about how to keep the spark alive in your relationship.

I work with a lot of different couples, and sometimes I hear someone say something like, oh, we've known each other for 20 years, what else is there to learn? And then sometimes I'll talk to people and and someone will say, yeah, we are doing this and that and trying new ways so that we can learn more about each other and try to keep that spark alive. So, um, I think it is a little bit, um, perspective of how you see things. And I am definitely on team you can keep the spark alive and be interested in your partner and in your relationship. 20, 30, 40, 50 years after you guys have known each other.

So today I wanted to talk about five ways that we can keep the spark alive in our relationship. So the first thing that I always encourage my couples to do is to be able to communicate openly and honestly with each other. This is so important because it really lets you have a foundation of genuineness and really being able to feel comfortable expressing yourself to your partner. What's going well, what's not going well, just in general. Being able to have that open communication really helps to have a good foundation in your relationship. So definitely try to have that communication with each other regularly.

The second thing that I recommend is to do new things together. It's very easy to get caught up in kind of the old routine or doing the same things, and feeling honestly like there's, you know, you are stuck and like, what else can we do? And it can be boring and you do the same thing all the time, but you don't have to do that. You can always decide, hey, like, let's find something that we both really like that we haven't done in a while or maybe ever and give that a try and have this new experience together to do new things together. Just automatically will give you new things to talk about, new things to learn about each other. Did you like it? Did you not like it? You know, do you want to do it again? What can we do? Different gives you lots of different things to talk about and to be interested in. 

Don't forget to go to my website about a relationship coaching. Com and take the free Couples Connection quiz to find out how connected you and your partner are, and get relationship advice to help you just where you are in your relationship now.

The third thing that I recommend is to take care of yourselves. So for me, and what I really recommend when working with couples is you have to build in that time for self-care. When you're taking care of yourself, you're going to be in a much, much better position to show up authentically and refreshed and really feeling good in your relationship. If you're not prioritizing your own needs somewhere in there in your daily routine, then it's going to become frustrating and overwhelming and you may have resentments. Um, it's just really important to give back to yourself so that you can then give to your partner and your relationship. So I don't consider this something that's like optional, or if I have time, I really think that, uh, in order for you to have the best relationship you can, you need to definitely make time to take care of yourself.

The fourth way here to help keep that spark alive is to really support each other. Let your partner know that you're thinking of them, that you're there for them if they need something, when things are going well, when things aren't going well, if they're having trouble at work or with extended family or, you know, whatever might be going on, that you're there to share in that with them if they have their own goals for themselves. What can you do to help support them in reaching those goals? Just kind of generally across the board, when your partner knows that you're thinking of them and what they're working on or what they have going on, it's going to just automatically build and maintain that connection you guys have together.

And then the last thing is to not give up. Relationships are hard. They take a lot of work and they're totally worth it. But if you feel like you're having a hard time and you're not really getting to where you want to be in your relationship on your own. Definitely reach out for help from a couples therapist or a relationship coach. They can really provide a lot of guidance and support to help you get to where you want to be in your relationship. But if you do it on your own or with help, just, you know, don't give up on it. It is work, but it's it's definitely worth it.

And then lastly, a little bonus here. Act like you like each other, right? Be affectionate. Hold hands, give hugs, give kisses. You know, um. Be romantic. Do sweet things for each other. Spend time together, you know, just act like you like each other. That, you know, obviously goes a really long way. Uh, I don't think that can be understated in terms of its importance.

All right, that is it today. I hope this was helpful for you. Until next time, take care of yourself and take care of each other. Thanks.